What do I do???

[motown]

Not sure this is the right area but I just wanted some helping and feed back.

Basically I've had to go away for to work Monday to Friday, so means I'm away during the week. So I've had a 17 year old girl who I've known for years thats a super duper jockey but her parents won't buy her a horse, so she dose three nights a week to give my mum a rest from doing my pony.

On these nights all I want her to do is put up an already made up haynet up, a quick skip out and ride him. School him twice a week for 30-40mins and hack him out once a week for an hour. So a tops of 1 and half work a night. If she can't do the riding or jobs then she is to let us know and I would phone my instructor and see if she could give him a school or my mum would lunge him and do jobs at night. Not a problem just need to know

She has been doing this for around a year and in return I pay her around 60-80 a month depending how long she's hacked for and if she done a few extra jobs she has extra and if she wishes to take my pony out, which she has, cubing and show jumping, I pay for her food, ponies classes and get him there. I do this as I really appreciate what she does for me.

Now It's been brought to my attention by three different people that she doesn't ride him and actully gets her bf to do the jobs! Even when I've asked her how's he gone tonight,she has answered my texted by saying yep he's gone well but not managed to ride for long as I had college work or I'm ill, or I've lunged him or don't get a reply. I don't often text her as I don't want to think I'm checking up on her but my pony is only a baby and I'm generally interested in her and the pony.

Now I was in shock and couldn't believe that she would do this as I thought we were friends and I always try once twice a month phone or see her in person to have a chat about everything other then the horse so we can have a relationship! My mum went spare as she has done so much for this young girl as she also has really appreciated the help she has given us in the time I've had to work away.

The girl was due to be taking him cubbing so my mum rang her to arrange knowing what had been said and the girl in question was bit arsie,so my mum said don't worry if you don't want to go anymore,just let me know so I can plan the weekend, Text me later with your answer and ended the call saying you know how much we appreciate your help if there is anything we can do to help or if there's ever a problem please just let us know.

We then got an abusive text saying we had no reason to talk to her the way we do and she is spending hours a week working our horse for nothing!!! Plus he's a total idiot and waste of time.

My poor mum was so upset. I being at work had no other choice then to speak to her on the phone, I'd rather have done it in person. When I spoke to her I was v calm and to the point to which she kept saying I'm sorry and that she will pull her socks up and she would apologies to my mum.

Which she did and said the reason she was being like that is she thought I was going to get rid of her in the new year when I returned from working away. To which I replied why would you think that I would have spoken to you and that the way she behaved is not how you behave if you wanted a job. Again she apologised and I said it was to be forgotten.

Only two weeks on she not ridding and lying to us again. What do I do? I feel like shouting at her but that's no good and teaches her nothing! To be honest the things I heard the last three weeks and I've seen her do it once to my poor pony who's only a baby I feel like sitting on her smacking her for no reason and telling her she's a waste of space and an idiot but I'm a grown up and it's no way to treat other people!

Sorry for the rant but do I get rid of her? or give her a good talking to knowing she going to be a difficult teenager and try sort her out!

Do you think someone else would like the chance to be paid to help me school my pony? He a bloody saint A lazy one but not wonder now I know he's not having the work he should be having but if anybody comes to the yard they fall in love with him he's such a lovely boy and never done anything naughty or nasty!!! Where do I find someone if I do get rid and how much do I look to pay someone. Thanks

[bethanyy]

I'd tell her straight that you don't want her to do your pony anymore for reasons you have stated above. She is basically a jumped up brat who is taking advantage of you, you, your mum and pony don't deserve the hassle, especially if you're paying her and she isn't even doing the jobs. Cheeky little cow.

You will be able to find a better jockey who would appreciate you and your pony's education more. Don't get me wrong it's difficult to find a decent trustworthy jockey but I wouldnt stand for her cr*p.

[bethanyy]

Forgot to say, best place to find a jockey is advertise on here ;D where are you based?

[Redsky]

I agree with Beth, I know its difficult finding a jockey but the current one sounds like a but of a brat

[victoria264]

I agree with the above! Get rid of her!! Shes obviously not that bothered about your pony and sounds to me like she xant really be bothered :/ there are plenty of other people that would come ride him and do jobs and i can guess that they are going to be more reliable and will actually do what you ask..

[judyh]

Agree get rid!!!

[motown]

Thanks everybody! I've now got to do the right thing by us and my pony not by her as sad as it is I'm going to lose a friend. Now the hard job in finding someone to help me. How much you reckon is the going rate for riding and doing a few jobs?

[gilbertgrape]

Round here about £7-£10 hour because its unskilled and cash in hand!.
Reliability is always a huge issue and if they've lied once they will again.
I had a teenage helper ( An equine college student ) who helped me and she was asked to feed the ponies once because we had a problem that day. She didn't do the job left them untended and sailed off on a holiday to Cornwall. how did I know? She plastered all her details on face book showing it was pre-planned.
Hope she shows more loyalty when employed as a" professional"
Trust is essential.

[rightrein92]

Oh no I dont understand how people can do this I wouldn't dream of deceiving someone like this when my friend was poorly I did her pony as if it was my own for well over two months I mucked out fed hayed daily and rode three four times a week she gave me 100 to cover my fuel obviously this is a friend favour but still would never have let her pony suffer x

[Jenna]

get rid, shes very lucky to have use of a pony and be paid for it, shes got everything handed to her on a plate. When i was her age i would of killed to be in her position, and to get paid is a bonus!
Find someone who appreciates you, your mum and the pony

[KneesUp]

I agree with all of the above. Until recently I was riding for someone, and in return i'd get to ride at shows etc. Being paid wasn't an option but I loved just being able to 1- ride some fabulous ponies and 2- just know that i was helping out. There will be someone else out there who will love to help you out and will respect you. Your pony isnt benefiting from her not riding and thats not fair on you, your mum or your poor pony. You'll soon find someone who is willing to help you and you'll make another, better friend Good luck

[nj]

OH gosh, what a little brat, I remember going back 15yrs ago, in our local village there were some lovely people who had 2 ex race horses, they loved them to bits but they only lived there on weekends, they asked me if I would be happy to feed them once a day, and just generally check on them, they were in a field with shelter and had rugs on, so I used to everyday, take the rugs off and brush them all out of my heart, on sunday night the people would usually do the morning feed ready for monday before they set off, I used to get that feed and there was always 60 pounds in one of the feed bucket, £60 15yrs ago was a blooming large amount, especially for what I had to do, I hated taking the money so I used to take £20 of it and leave the rest for them, they never said anything but always left £60 each week, at Christmas I couldn't believe that they gave me a xmas card and boy it was really thick, when I went home and open it, all the £40 I had left back for them was given to me and they gave me £600 at xmas, they refused to take it back and felt very offended, they were lovely people, they didn't want me to ride them, they rode them on weekends when they were home,
now days god knows what teenagers expect, a whole week pay for a few hours a week

[mollymalone]

I have to say it does seem that there are a few teenagers around these days who do get paid for things that years ago anyone would have given their right arm to do for for the love of it, not for the money. And teenagers also seem to be very "back chattish" as well - its one thing to be rude to your parents in a teenagish way but the complete disrespect some teenagers seem to have for anyone older than them, and for people who actually pay them, is something that makes me wonder what these people will be like when they get a "proper job" and have to work for senior people, take instructions from others, regardless of whether they agree with it.