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Post by stinkpig on Jan 15, 2008 21:00:37 GMT
White socks, silk cravat and satin thong. The only thing that would put things right would be a full body massage performed by............
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Post by seahorse on Jan 15, 2008 21:06:53 GMT
Paul Daniels, Ken Dodd and all the Diddy men and of course half the local fire force but they had been called out to resuce fart monkey and skinkpigs horse who were..............
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Post by stinkpig on Jan 15, 2008 21:11:55 GMT
partying in the paddock only to find themselves surrounded by the local hounds who were holding them to ransom until they told them where to find lorrydog, although fartmonkey insisted they didn't know, the hounds........
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Post by seahorse on Jan 15, 2008 21:23:03 GMT
said that they must have seen them because a fat orange pony a beautiful coloured filly were seen galloping in the area, and why did fartmonkey never go hunting he said it was because seahorse was too scared to take him and would only take fat cob if he did go he would.....................................
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Post by stinkpig on Jan 15, 2008 21:26:31 GMT
get very dirty and his girlfriend really wouldn't like that but if they promised he would keep clean he would try and persuade seahorse to take him to..........
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Post by ammevo on Jan 15, 2008 21:40:14 GMT
a glass or two of her favorite tiple....
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Post by seahorse on Jan 15, 2008 22:00:15 GMT
Which she would need before getting near the fire breathing Welsh Dragon, on taking farts hunting he galloped though a hedge in to local pond where he and seahorse were pulled out by ..............................
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Milliesmum
H G Addict
COCKERP00S RULE!!!
Posts: 23,901
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Post by Milliesmum on Jan 15, 2008 22:03:23 GMT
A large man in flippers and a rubber wetsuit, who upon asking Seahorse to hold his snorkel revealed that his day job was as a brickie, hence the large shoulders and muscular arms. Seahorse reluctantly let go of his snorkel and said . . . . .
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Post by seahorse on Jan 15, 2008 22:10:55 GMT
oh hello your rather nice what lovley arms you have, have you ever considered becoming a fireman the uniform would look so nice on you as a thank you for resueing me would you like to come to ponies uk to meet some lovely people like millismum, ferret, skinkpig, halfpass and lots of others including overbent, overatheknee and the cremellosocietynd lots of others for a big party. At this point Fart monkey bored of waiting to be rescued lived up to his name and let rip causing..............................
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Milliesmum
H G Addict
COCKERP00S RULE!!!
Posts: 23,901
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Post by Milliesmum on Jan 15, 2008 22:15:00 GMT
a mini tidal wave, engulfing seahorse but it was ok because the diver let her borrow his snorkel and then he rescued her all over again, this was becoming quite a habit. Then they got Farts to swim out of the pond and as he stood dripping on the bank, the diver said . . . .
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Post by seahorse on Jan 15, 2008 22:19:55 GMT
wow what a funny looking donkey why are his ears short and is this not the one you were given to milliesmum or has she found out what a little s@d he is. milliesmum turns up and take fart monkey away to work as a...................................
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Post by ferret on Jan 15, 2008 23:11:23 GMT
circus entertainer ...'Fart monkey the amazing farting pony '....Farts had a long and successful international career and made his proud Mummy Seahorse loads of wonga she can occasionallly be spotted in her ......
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Post by overatdaknee on Jan 16, 2008 8:12:34 GMT
Chanel, Gucci coupled with Dubarry's- every designer label under the sun. However her most extravagant purchase, and one that Farts most def approved of, was a beautiful grey.............
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Post by seahorse on Jan 16, 2008 16:52:05 GMT
Filly section A so it was smaller than him and he followed her round the field for days pineing when filly went to ponies uk with seahorse and not him so he got on the motor way and pointed a hoof when a big lorry stopped and..............................
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Post by overatdaknee on Jan 16, 2008 17:00:28 GMT
hitched a lift to Newark in the back of an Eddie Stobart lorry. As the truck pulled onto the showground, davina appeared from behind a telephone box and shouted...............
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Post by dun4u on Jan 16, 2008 17:04:40 GMT
I say, don't you know you can't park there? Where's your horse passport? Is it a registered pony? Do I know you? No, we're not running late, we just have soooo many entries that our well-worn-out stewards are having a job to cope. At which fart-monkey replied ......
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Post by stinkpig on Jan 16, 2008 17:07:08 GMT
Nothing new there then ! With that Davina turned on her heel and................
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Post by dun4u on Jan 16, 2008 17:29:41 GMT
...and marched off, only to be stopped in her tracks by a competitor dressed in a flowing pink frock and with a tatoo of a balerina on his shoulder. Her heart missed a beat as their eyes met .....
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Post by overatdaknee on Jan 16, 2008 17:35:36 GMT
..his eyes as large and as liquid as the pony he was leading....................Davina stuttered....if, if that is a B you will find the ring is the opposite direction...
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Post by dun4u on Jan 16, 2008 17:45:20 GMT
"...... bbbut.... " halfpass, stuttered ....... "I have found what I have been looking for. Come 'ere me beauty!" "No!!!!" she replied, "the fancy-dress is over in the Purple Ring and the B's are in that direction", she raised her arm and pointed ......
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halfpass
Happy to help....a lot
Return of the Dame
Posts: 12,964
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Post by halfpass on Jan 16, 2008 17:52:00 GMT
halfpass thanked her and to put her out of her missery told her not only was she barking up the wrong tree she was in the wrong forrest at this a crest fallen Davina went
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Post by stinkpig on Jan 16, 2008 17:52:31 GMT
in the direction of the main arena, But i've only come to show you my tu-tu said halfpass, with that Davina fell to the floor in a faint and halfpass......................
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Post by ammevo on Jan 16, 2008 17:54:00 GMT
....at the car park attendant who still had his day-glo safety jackets with luminous stripes that gallantly hid halfpasses the at anouther show...
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Post by overatdaknee on Jan 16, 2008 17:54:08 GMT
.........needless to say the rest of the gang were there too, setting up camp and getting happily blitzed..........a huge cry came from one of the camps 'I don't believe it- I've forgotten the.............'
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Post by stinkpig on Jan 16, 2008 18:02:43 GMT
corkscrew ! Don't worry said halfpass who had changed into his boyscout uniform, In my pocket i have..............
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Post by overatdaknee on Jan 16, 2008 18:09:35 GMT
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Post by ammevo on Jan 16, 2008 18:13:13 GMT
....it was so small they struggled to see it but...
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Post by overatdaknee on Jan 16, 2008 18:15:26 GMT
.there emerging from the lining of Halpasses Scout uniform was..............
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Post by stinkpig on Jan 16, 2008 18:15:42 GMT
at last it appeared, IS THAT IT we all cried ! What did you expect said halfpass a................
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Post by overatdaknee on Jan 16, 2008 18:18:32 GMT
neutron bomb? The hoofpick was attached to something small and furry, everyone squinted for a better look......
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