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Post by Inneedofadvice on Feb 6, 2010 19:36:06 GMT
I would really appreciate peoples opinions on a difficult situation i am in, as follows. My show horse has been on full livery for a couple of months. It was a difficult decision to put him there as we usually do from home but i found a small yard with fantastic standards and two wonderful owners. All was well in fact I couldn't believe how wonderful they were but recently I have had a few issues, I am not overly fussy or interfering but did outline clearly things i would prefer. one thing is i like him bought in early he is fully clipped, this has been getting later and later. I always go to ride at the same time each day but turned up the other day and yard was locked up as they were in pub with friends didn't come back for another hour but made sure they were there in time for other liveries. Today my horse was not watered after being in all day til 4 pm and was supposed to be ridden by them but they ran out of time because they we going out- they managed to ride the new livery though My problem is we have become very good friends and I understand they are busy and work long hours but I am feeling a bit put to one side if that makes sense and don't know whether to see how things go or try and speak to them ?sorry so long!
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Post by stephjw1 on Feb 6, 2010 20:29:46 GMT
Always difficult if you are friends but you are paying for a service that you dont seem to be getting you are going to have to tell them exactly what you want and expect, and see if this is acceptable to them. Good luck with it
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Post by lillicob on Feb 6, 2010 21:05:56 GMT
Personally at the prices of full livery nowadays i would expect what i am paying for. I would of gone mad if my horse had no water. Possibly the problem is that because you have become such good friends and they think that they can get away with it because you havent said anything to them. I would definately have a chat, at the end of the day they are providing you with a service and if it was me and i wasnt getting that i would have to say something.
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Post by inneedofadvice on Feb 6, 2010 21:26:50 GMT
The friends thing is def a problem, I have also been doing a lot for them lately. I just feel as new people arrive I get pushed further down the pile because their horses are being done properly The funny thing is they are sooo obsessive about their yard normally!! It is very difficult and they are so lovely I find it hard to be cross and say everything I want to once we are face to face, stupid I know!
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Post by ellieraga on Feb 6, 2010 22:00:15 GMT
Friends or not friends i wouldnt expect any yard to leave a horse without water !!!
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Post by brindlerainbow on Feb 6, 2010 22:13:41 GMT
It sounds like in the eyes of the yard owners your status has changed from client to friend. Clients are treated professionally whereas friends get the p*ss taken out of them because friends allow things to happen which a client wouldnt. You need to state your concerns to them in a pleasant way and then shift back to being a client and away from being a friend. Continue to be friendly towards them but just back off the good friends thing otherwise it will end in tears Good luck,hope you get things sorted out!!
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Post by sageandonion on Feb 7, 2010 15:45:18 GMT
Totally agree with brindle here. Never ever mix business with pleasure. You need to speak out now (as difficult as it is) or things will get worse and build up until you are so cross everything will come out wrong.
You must then cool things off and get back to client status or find a new livery yard where you start as you mean to go on and learn by your mistakes.
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Post by boots & saddles on Feb 7, 2010 16:07:59 GMT
before you tell them your concerns have soewhere else lined up incase they tell you where to go. i dont think anyone should get away with leaving a horse with no water, as for him being fully clipped and coming in early, mine live out most of the time fully clipped and come to no harm as long as there rugged correctly, so shouldnt be the end of the world im sure they have a routine when bringng in clients horses and would preffer to stick to it, but no water not good enough.
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Post by hollycane on Feb 7, 2010 19:11:30 GMT
You can't be "friends" with people you are paying. Unfortunately I have had this happen to me and seen it so many times with others. Please make sure you take a deep breath and have a friendly chat with them telling them exactly what it is that you are expecting to get for your money. Start it off with something like "I think I misunderstood but I thought you would...." It's just too much money to throw away especialy when you usually do your horses yourself. It will drive you nuts if you don't get it sorted.
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Post by lillicob on Feb 7, 2010 20:48:33 GMT
It is hard when people are nice and friends to get mad with them face to face. Having said that you are paying as much as everyone else so you should get what you are paying for.. I would take a step back from helping them out as much and try and keep it on more of a business level, you can be polite etc and friendly but try and get back to being a client, business and pleasure dont always mix. I've made mistakes on the yard i'm on by constantly doing things for people as a favour and it leads to getting the pee taken out of you and sometimes a falling out. I'm sure itll work out for you. It is hard but the no water thing would of driven me mad!
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Post by Inneedofadvice on Feb 7, 2010 22:46:37 GMT
Thanks for your comments and yes you are all right, mixing business and pleasure doesn't mix especially as I cant turn a blind eye where my horse is concerned, I chose their yard in the first place because I felt I was happy with their standards, The water thing was bad especially because as soon as he had a drink he started eating the haylage he had been stood at back of stable and was left in all his night rugs ( usually one or two are off inday) so was quite warm, but also the not exercising thing is rankling because they wouldn't do it to others! Because we have recently moved quite a long way I suppose I have been glad to find some new horsey friends but I know deep down I have to sort this out!
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Post by lillicob on Feb 8, 2010 10:35:41 GMT
Must be hard for you. I can understand where you are coming from, it is sometimes hard to say things to people especially friends, ive let things go and calmed down about things then something else happens and get mad again and in the end nothing gets sorted because no one wants to fall out and argue. I only had mine on full livery when she went off for 10 days to be ridden away and i hated it, i went nearly everyday and pretty much mucked her out myself the whole time, dont think i could do it on a permanent basis!
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Post by Inneedofadvice on Feb 8, 2010 22:52:02 GMT
Lillicob that is exactly what happens I get mad, rage at my poor family then the people in question do something nice I feel mean so say nothing then few days later off we go again.At work I am so tough but useless with friends!!
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Post by pipspears on Feb 9, 2010 9:32:56 GMT
you pay for a service they dont give you a discount for being there freind and if you pay you should get what you pay for be direct and tell them that if standards dont improve youll have no other choise but to leave,, just remind them of your initial requirements,, hopefully you will not have to leave and the matter resolved good luck
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Post by lillicob on Feb 9, 2010 10:30:53 GMT
Think it must be the same at every yard!! But even at DIY there is a level of service that you expect and pay for. The next time something happens or they dont do what it is you ask just do as pipsears said and remind them of your and your horses requirements. Do they have grooms or do they do it themselves? I'm on a great yard where everyones nice and we all get on but at times you get driven insane by crazy comments and general untidyness!
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Post by Guestless on Feb 10, 2010 14:24:14 GMT
You can't be "friends" with people you are paying. You can - our YM is a friend. It can be awkward at times as there will always be issues (no matter how small) that you don't agree on, but it is possible to keep separate hats to deal with those....I guess it depends on the strength of the friendship.
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Post by perfect on Feb 10, 2010 22:56:49 GMT
can i ask what people on full livery pay and what do they get for there money. also what do you pay for grass livery in summer and winter and again what do you get for your money
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Post by savnlucy on Feb 11, 2010 10:02:22 GMT
we have a " friend " on diy livery and i ve lost count the amount of time weve had a call to just put water in, just give her some hay, just chuck a feed in ...... its a joke but as she is a "friend " she thinks its ok to take liberties it drives me mad but im like you dont like to upset people but its coming to a head trust me, i just need to practice what i preach but its hard and i feel sorry for you
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Post by lillicob on Feb 11, 2010 12:10:34 GMT
Our YM is a friend, she went out of her way to accomodate our old horse we bought back, turned her own out so we could have her stable. Think you get people asking favours which for me is ok, then there are people who take the mick and arrange things knowing they wont be there and you have to deal with it for them.
On DIY each horse is the owners responsibility.
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Post by princessstacie22 on Feb 25, 2010 19:46:27 GMT
how are you getting on now? Have you resolved your problems??
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