ruining my horse?????

[nightwish]

Hi

im quite upset with myself, i feel like im ruining my 5 year old horse, she was broken by my friend, she did fab with her, after a week of my friend being on she chucked me on and for about 2 months she was amazing.
moved yards, being at the new one about month and a half now, tbh i love it, but..ahh heres the BUT lol, anyway she was off for 3 weeks with a bad back, still has a bad back, but its relating to her locking stifle my phyiso has been out and told me to long rein her till my saddler comes to see my horse, did that, the new saddle had to be sent off to be changed as she changed shape :/ so she told me to ride in the other one i have, she checked it was ok, and my phyiso said carry on what your doing riding etc etc, ive got to work her thorough this as the locking stifle does get better with correct ridden work, ive just nicely been on her this last week about 3 times, my friend wanted me to walk down the road with her but im not confident on the road so i got my other friend to get on and this person said she was hard mouthed and set in her neck, this upset me as im not bad with my hands i consider me to soft lol, but it upset me lots and im trying my best, but i feel like im letting my horse down and judged because i didnt follow someone elses advice even though they said they wouldnt be offended. its confused me all this. i cant seem to do anything right, even with my other horse, i feel like im being watched all the time. but i think its more me and take things to heart to much. what are your opinions? i would be grateful

[bow1607]

Firstly, you have done all the right things by having a problem with your horse and getting it dealt with (physio/saddler) so big pat on the back for that.
If you have soft hands and your friend is quite heavy handed she maybe setting herself against your friend as she isn't used to a heavy contact.
Do you have lessons?
If you do then ask your instructor what he/she thinks...........if not it will be a good idea, to build up your confidence in your ability and also if you are riding too "light" in the hand your instructor will be able to guide you better because she needs to accept a contact (obviously I can't judge as haven't seen you ride her)
Best of luck, and stop giving yourself a hard time x

[nightwish]

hi Bow1607 thanks. i do give myself a hard time. i should stop. maybe stop asking other people for help too lol thanks x

[sarahp]

Young horse progress is frequently two steps forward, one step back for any number of reasons. Don't stress about that, or what anyone else says, but just keep on dealing kindly and sympathetically with things as they crop up and you will be rewarded in the end by a lovely horse.

[GinaGeo]

Do you have an Intructor? It makes life easier, to have one proffesional to turn to at times like this, rather than several people each with their own opinions, that's just confuses you and the horse.

[nightwish]

thanks everyone its a very confusing time. and i dont have an trainer at the minute looking for a good on though x

[GinaGeo]

Good Luck - a good trainer's invaluable. Go by word of mouth if you can, reccomendations always the best

[mady]

Jul 9, 2012 6:48:52 GMT sarahp said:

Young horse progress is frequently two steps forward, one step back for any number of reasons. Don't stress about that, or what anyone else says, but just keep on dealing kindly and sympathetically with things as they crop up and you will be rewarded in the end by a lovely horse.

i agree with sarahp. somedays you think why do you waste your time then the next they are amazing. You just have to carry on without getting too frustrated as they sense it.

Get a good instructor possibly away from yard if you have transport then you do not have everyone watching when things go a bit pear shaped.

good luck and keep smiling it will come together

[nightwish]

thank you

[FF]

Young horses can be amazing one day and then dreadful the next. Your horse may also be tense due to the fact he's not used to being hacked out so may have been tense and hard mouthed. My friends horse goes lovely in the school but when he hacks out (especially on his own) he's very tense and sets his neck. He does settle but has good days and bad days. The more you do it the more confident they become. Stick at it, it's your horse.

[sageandonion]

Definitely DO NOT have people on the yard ride your horse, don't ask their advice and if they give it unprompted smile, say thank you and let it in one ear and out the other. Get yourself a good instructor and use your instructor as your sounding board and if any riding needs doing that you are not confident about, pay him/her to do it properly.

It is other people that will ruin your horse and they will make a good job of ruining your confidence and enjoyment at the same time.

[nightwish]

thanks