Separation anxiety

[dougal]

We very sadly lost Maggie,our beautiful 14 year old JR on Thursday and miss her terribly, she was the best friend you could ever wish for. We have a 4 month old Springer puppy who misses her so much too, they've been together since Molly was 8 weeks old and Mags became her mum for such a short time and now can't get Molly to sleep on her own and every time we go out of the room she cries and howls. It's so sad to hear her like this and wonder if anyone has overcome this problem with any of their doglets...she's fine when we go out on walks or have play sessions. Tried her crate but still cried, left her as long as we could due to not upsetting the neighbours too much, hoping she'll come through this soon but it's so hard when they don't understand where their "mum" has gone.

[suzee]

A sad time for you all.I would suggest that you get Molly into a new routine to occupy her as much as possible and help her to adjust.Plenty of exercise and playtime,perhaps a Kong toy or similar to fill with food as a distraction,regular crate time with a toy,perhaps a good game
before bedtime to relax her,basically as much occupation as possible.,she will come to terms
with your loss.

[dougal]

Thank you Suzee, will try the bedtime game as she always falls asleep with us about 7pm so maybe keeping her awake and occupied may well relax her more and hopefully she'll sleep peacefully. I take her with me to the ponies in the morning and let her wear herself out running about and playing in the stables and she's fine doing this on her own, she loves her crate in the car and I can leave her in it for a good while when I sort the ponies out and she doesn't cry at all, only at home.

[suzee]

It will take time,don't want to sound mean but our old vet always recommended in cases like this not to be too sympathetic,sounds a bit harsh but the idea being that hard as it is you
present a calm matter of fact persona to help settle things ,hence varying the routine where possible.

[princessstacie22]

i know this sounds harsh but the more you ponder to her the more she will play in it. Yes she is missing her mum ect but act like nothing has happened. She will soon snap out of it. Otherwise you could be setting yourself up for more trouble.
If she cries or howls, leave her to it. give her a blanket that your old JR used to lay on, so it has her scent on it.
as suzee says you need to be calm and assertive and this itself will tell your new pup that things are going to be ok. xx

[dougal]

Molly went off to puppy classes last night and the trainer told us to wear her out before bedtime and she'd be so relaxed and tired she'd be glad to go to sleep.....played with her for two hours, chasing balls, hiding them for her to find, everything that was mentally and physically tiring but to no avail...were very calm and assertive but she howled and howled, we let it go on for nearly an hour then could stand it no more, could see us being reported for disturbance! Hubby stayed downstairs with her until she fell asleep then quietly slipped away and she slept until 6am which was great, we only had about two hours sleep all night, not too bad for me as I don't have to work but hubby does and I did feel for him, he looked awful...worse than usual! Lol. We'll see what tonight brings...brings back memories of new babies..arghhhhhhhhhhhh.

[vet nurse]

i would call and speak to your vet. well actually you will probably get more knowledgable advice from a vet nurse at your vets! but definately call them! there is so much advice they can give you and that is what they are there for. its not something you can get the answer to from a few bits of info on here (not saying its wrong, just that there is a lot more to it and a lot more that can be done to help).

make sure they cover crate training, DAP, and you need to start small, so leaving her for a few mins at a time and building it up (obv you have to leave her overnight but the small periods alone have to be done too). dont let her follow you around the house, randomly shut doors so that she cant see you etc. unfortunately a lot of people encourage their puppies to be next to them every min of the day (whether its because they cant get enough of their cuteness or that they want to make sure they aroe not wrecking the house!!) but this will encourage separation anxiety and will make leaving the puppy alone a lot harder.

all this needs to be done in a controlled way so please contact your vets for advice and if there is no one there who feels they have enough experience to help you they can put you on to someone who can. it may cost money but its worth it rather than living with an anxious dog which is not only hard for you but also not a very nice way for any dog to live. hope this helps . oh and if you have insurance some companies will cover behavioural consult costs :-)

[suzee]

Hello Dougal hope Molly is getting more settled,she is only a baby so with firmness and
tolerance she should start "behaving"There are many very experienced dog owners on HG
so I'm sure a solution can be found without a trip to the vets.

[dougal]

Thanks Suzee....well it's silly o'clock as I type this and left Molly in the lounge in her favourite spot on the sofa , no crying or howling but she did wake up at 4am which I didn't mind at all as she was happy and just wanted a wee, bless her. Hopefully she'll sleep longer as time goes on but to have a night where she wasn't upset and stressed was lovely for me and her. Left her with plenty of things to chew on (instead of my furniture lol) she's now full of fun and wants to play! Thanks for all your kind words .

[dazycutter]

I would certainly use a crate for her at night.. they feel safe and secure in those.. you can also put in one of your t shirts that you have worn as a comfort blancket for her..

good luck.. she will come to terms with it..

[dazycutter]

Feb 24, 2010 12:12:20 GMT @vet nurse said:

its not something you can get the answer to from a few bits of info on here (not saying its wrong, just that there is a lot more to it and a lot more that can be done to help).

:-)

I do agree that you should balance advice between vets and professional advice etc, but there are many people on here who are very experienced dog owners/breeders who can also offer a wealth of advice as well.... :-)

[princessstacie22]

Feb 25, 2010 11:09:30 GMT dazycutter said:

Feb 24, 2010 12:12:20 GMT @vet nurse said:

its not something you can get the answer to from a few bits of info on here (not saying its wrong, just that there is a lot more to it and a lot more that can be done to help).

:-)

I do agree that you should balance advice between vets and professional advice etc, but there are many people on here who are very experienced dog owners/breeders who can also offer a wealth of advice as well.... :-)

i agree

[princessstacie22]

Feb 24, 2010 12:12:20 GMT @vet nurse said:

i would call and speak to your vet. well actually you will probably get more knowledgable advice from a vet nurse at your vets! but definately call them! there is so much advice they can give you and that is what they are there for. its not something you can get the answer to from a few bits of info on here (not saying its wrong, just that there is a lot more to it and a lot more that can be done to help).

make sure they cover crate training, DAP, and you need to start small, so leaving her for a few mins at a time and building it up (obv you have to leave her overnight but the small periods alone have to be done too). dont let her follow you around the house, randomly shut doors so that she cant see you etc. unfortunately a lot of people encourage their puppies to be next to them every min of the day (whether its because they cant get enough of their cuteness or that they want to make sure they aroe not wrecking the house!!) but this will encourage separation anxiety and will make leaving the puppy alone a lot harder.

all this needs to be done in a controlled way so please contact your vets for advice and if there is no one there who feels they have enough experience to help you they can put you on to someone who can. it may cost money but its worth it rather than living with an anxious dog which is not only hard for you but also not a very nice way for any dog to live. hope this helps . oh and if you have insurance some companies will cover behavioural consult costs :-)

Can i just add that some people on here are vet nurses, and some may not be but still have more experience than most.

So dougal, you probably could take alot of notice from the advice thats been given.

[dougal]

Thanks everyone for all your help....Molly is now very happy....we found her a beautiful Parson Jack Russell who is just two months older than her and they are so happy together. After 10 days Molly still cried and cried at night in spite of trying everything and we were feeling desperate with no sleep so we took Molly to meet this little girl and she is a changed doglet, we now have a good 6 hours sleep at night, they are both in crates and don't make a sound. Here's a pic of beautiful Lily and Molly.





Love them both to bits and life is peaceful and happy again.

[dazycutter]

best news ever.... glad its all worked out for you...

[dougal]

Thank you so much Dazycutter

[suzee]

Two lovely photos,best wishes for lots of fun in the future,glad everyone is happy.

[princessstacie22]

so glad its worked out for you. They both look so happy xx

[dougal]

Thank you so much!